I

It's Our Little Secret Ladies

One day in the Garden of Eden, Eve calls out to God:
"God, I have a problem!"
"What's the problem, Eve?" asks God.
"God, I know you created me
and provided this beautiful garden
and all of these wonderful animals
and that hilarious comedic snake,
but I'm just not happy."

"Why is that, Eve?" came the reply from above.

"God, I am lonely, and I'm sick to death of apples."

"Well, Eve, in that case, I have a solution.
I shall create man for you...
But this man will be a flawed creature,
with many bad traits.
He'll lie, cheat, and be vain glorious;
all in all, he'll give you a hard time.
But, on the plus side, he'll be bigger,
faster, and will like to hunt and kill things.
He will look silly when he's aroused,
but since you've been complaining,
I'll create him in such a way
that he will satisfy your physical needs.
He will be witless and will revel in childish things
like fighting and kicking a ball about.
He won't be too smart,
so he'll also need your advice to think properly."

"Sounds great," says Eve,
with an ironically raised eyebrow.
"What's the catch, God?"

"Well ... you can have him on one condition."

"What's that, God?"
"As I said, he'll be proud, arrogant,
and self-admiring...
So you'll have to let him believe that I made him first.

Just remember, it's our little secret...
You know, woman to woman."